Being in that halfway house blew my mind. We had to wake up early for morning reflection and work, and then we had to do a Twelve Step meeting at night. And again, they were big on this God thing. I laughed and thought how lame it was. That's just the answer for weak people. That won't work for me. So again, I acted like it didn't matter, played the game, and tried to follow my plan. But when my plan fell apart, I took off. I left with every intention of not getting loaded. I wasn't going to screw this up. But after a few days, I ended up in that black hole, a place filled with chaos and turmoil and feelings I knew nothing about. So I went back to my friend alcohol, who led me back to crystal meth and running and gunning.