Andy gave my mum a pair of karaoke mics for her birthday.
He knows she’s never done karaoke in her life and in fact the most modern song she’s ever sung is Handel’s ‘Messiah’ in the church choir. And as I saw her open the gift, trying to think of something polite to say, I thought about how Andy always does whatever Andy wants to do. I thought back on all the presents I’d bought for his mum over the years and how much time I’d put into each of them – how I’d listened every time she said she liked a piece of jewellery I wore or mentioned a book she wanted to read and mentally noted it for her birthday and Christmas. Andy kept laughing to me afterwards about how baffled my mum had looked when she opened the present. And I realized he’d chosen not to be thoughtful but to be funny instead. To no one but himself.