Activity

Andy gave my mum a pair of karaoke mics for her birth­day.

He knows she’s never done karaoke in her life and in fact the most mod­ern song she’s ever sung is Han­del’s ‘Mes­siah’ in the church choir. And as I saw her open the gift, try­ing to think of some­thing po­lite to say, I thought about h…

I soon re­al­ized that in­evitabil­ity of ev­ery re­la­tion­ship: the things which ini­tially draw you to each other be­come the ex­act things that ir­ri­tate you the most. I’d loved Andy’s non­con­for­mity, which be­came ir­ri­ta­tion at the lack of struc­ture in his life. He’d loved my in­de­pen­…

‘This is too hard,’ she says, wav­ing her hands in a way that sug­gests she’s given up. ‘We can’t talk with­out hurt­ing each other. It doesn’t work.’

‘We can agree on that,’ I say. ‘Good­bye, Jen.’ I walk away and, af­ter a few paces, turn back. ‘I can’t even look at the sea any more be­cause i…

I have, in my slightly perkier mo­ments in the wake of my and Jen’s break-up, let my­self believe that chatting women up might be fun; that, with age, I might have got bet­ter at it. For some rea­son, this as­sump­tion gets stronger with ev­ery break-up, de­spite not hav­ing done it for the years I…

Act II: Enter Ray. In his own words, Ray is a meat-and-potatoes man. He’s the happy product of successful male socialization: independent, self-reliant, and able to handle his own problems. He was not like the guys Joni usually dated—struggling, self-absorbed, emotionally undependable, alcoholic ar…