Q: Your warehouse workers work 11.5-hour shifts. In order to make rate, a significant number of them need to take over-the-counter painkillers multiple times per shift, which means regular backups at the medical office. Do you:

A. Scale back the rate—clearly, workers are at their physical limits
B. Make shifts shorter
C. Increase the number or duration of breaks
D. Increase staffing at the nurse’s office
E. Install vending machines to dispense painkillers more efficiently

Seriously—what kind of fucking sociopath goes with E?

But that’s just how Amazon is—all about thinking outside the box. After just one week at SDF8, it’s so obvious how “hire ambulances to wait around so workers with heatstroke can get to the hospital faster” seemed like a clever, innovative solution to someone.