It delighted me to glimpse people’s shadowed spots, the hidden recesses rarely visited even by themselves. I didn’t understand why any wife would want to stay out. Didn’t marrying the man indicate a willingness, if not a desire, to know him completely by sharing these sorts of private proclivities? But the implication of sharing is different when it’s someone you’re bound to. For me, a divulgence was simply interesting or amusing, but for some wives, perhaps, it happened within a context of long-standing imbalance or failure. If they felt neglected or put upon or rejected in their own ways, those sides of their husbands may have been irritating, disconcerting, disappointing, or they may not have had the energy to care. I think I handled my privileged information with respect. But it didn’t mean much to me because, usually, neither did the man.