There was a map of Vietnam on the wall of my apartment in Saigon and some nights, I’d lie on my bed and look at it, too tired to do anything more than just get my boots off. That map was a marvel, especially now that it wasn’t real anymore. For one thing, it was very old. It had been left there years before by another tenant, probably a Frenchman, since the map had been made in Paris. The paper had buckled in its frame after years in the wet Saigon heat, laying a kind of veil over the countries it depicted. Vietnam was divided into its older territories of Tonkin, Annam and Cochin China, and to the west past Laos and Cambodia sat Siam, a kingdom. That’s old, I’d tell visitors, that’s a really old map.
If dead ground could come back to haunt you the way dead people do, they’d have been able to mark my map CURRENT and burn the ones they’d been using since ’64, but count on it, nothing like that was going to happen. It was late ’67 now, even the most detailed maps didn’t reveal much anymore; reading them was like trying to read the faces of the Vietnamese, and that was like trying to read the wind. We knew that the uses of most information were flexible, different pieces of ground told different stories to different people. We also knew that for years now there had been no country but the war.
Take it a phrase at a time. There was a map of Vietnam. If the current craze for over-the-top drama had affected the writing of Dispatches, Herr might have started with some fiery, guts-spilled war scene. Instead, he starts with a carnal object, and his reflection on it. A “true” thing—maps are meant to convey veracity. We should be able to find our way with them. He starts in a small, almost dull, everyday object that just happens to be left behind in his transient’s apartment.
too tired to do anything more than just get my boots off. Herr doesn’t just tell us he’s tired; he gives us dramatic evidence of the extent. It’s another carnal moment of a type we all understand.
For one thing, it was very old. It had been left there years before by another tenant, probably a Frenchman, since the map had been made in Paris. Its antiqueness gives the map a kind of special radiance—a spiritual value, if you will. We also see Herr’s mind feeling for the truth, guessing that since it was made in Paris, a Frenchman had probably left it. It’s his first use of the word probably—the qualifier of a more truthful memoirist. He’s showing us his mind in action, his thoughtfulness, and how he tries to deduce the truth based on hard evidence.
from Michael Herr's book Dispatches
So right off, he readies us for voices weaving together and for radical shifts in tone from light to dark. As a writer you can’t just start jamming stuff together, hoping the reader will magically know what’s in your mind. You have to start out slowly, by laying transitions—like leaving breadcrumbs for the reader. Then the transitions get quicker through the book. As you get used to the method, the breadcrumbs grow fewer and eventually vanish. By the end, it’s all sped-up jump cuts with invisible connections the reader’s already mastered.
Aside from the simple geographical designation, Silicon Valley is the name for a psychological obsession found anyplace where people believe that instant fame and fortune can be gained through silicon chips and Web sites, or lotteries or stock-market trading. This dream nourishes itself on an addiction to money, power, and instant gratification. And like heroin and cocaine, it is highly illusory, promising total happiness, but often ending in disarray and despair.
[...] Workers and bosses? Those were twentieth-century phrases, according to the CEOs. They were outmoded, old-fashioned, irrelevant concepts. Their new mantra was: "We're all equal, we're all a team, we all work as owners of the company because we all have stock options. So unions are passé, since we all are owners who have a common interest: the harder you work, the more the company will grow, and the more money you will make. Unemployment is a meaningless word in our new economy. Our growth is permanent, so there is never any reason for company layoffs. Place your faith in the company, which will never let you down."
This sounded very reasonalbe to the young high-tech engineers [...] knew little about employment practices in the real world, since the Valley jobs were usually one of the first in their careers. The Valley companies made a specialty of hiring new or recent college graduates rather than seasoned workers in the high-tech industry. These young people were naive, malleable, and could be employed at a cut-rate wage scale. [...]
how many stock options you got, buddy
Not far away, Oracle CEO Larry Ellison is building a $40 million-plus replica of the Japanese Katsura palace on 23 wooded acres. Presumably, he'll be parking his new Marchetti Italian jet fighter elsewhere - perhaps next to the aerobatic plane he just bought as an eighth-grade graduation gift for his son. In Atherton, Tom Proulx, a co-founder of Intuit, recently bought three neighboring lots so he could build a 9-hole golf course in his backyard. One Woodside programmer bought 24 acres just to land his helicopter. "Keeping up with the neighbors in Silicon Valley is getting weird," says Daniel Case III, president and CEO of Humbrecht & Quist, Inc., It's not, "do your kids go to private school." It's "do they have a private jet?"
we gotta tax the shit out of these motherfuckers
[...] Kaleil had just quit his high paying job at the prestigious Wall Street firm of Goldman Sachs. But he and Tom felt "ordinary" because they hadn't yet become millionaires at the age of twenty-eight. They had an idea they thought was the key to fame and fortune: they would establish a Web site that made it easier to pay parking tickets, pay taxes, and buy licenses through their GovWorks Web site. They kept convincing themselves that they were right and speculated how wonderful it would be for people to use their Web site at three in the morning to buy a fishing license from home or attend a town meeting from a Web site while in their underwear.
this makes me wanna cry/laugh cus the fishing license part is almost identical to how toby described gov.uk/pay (ie, a public service that no one is profiting from)
best part: they end up raising 60m in VC (mostly FOMO i guess)
In the warp speed time of less than two years the tangible sixty-million-dollar investment turned into congealed snow. As the film documents their business descent into oblivion, the two entrepreneurs are shown in psychologically naked disarray, in contrast to their euphoric beginning. When their start-up began, there is a scene in a cab where both of them look at each other in amazement, with supernal delight in their faces. They say to each other: "We're going to become billionaires!" That is the high point of their ideals. It is evident then that creating a company as a public service had been the farthest thing from their minds. The money and power it gives was their driving force. (The curtain of public benefit is dropped in another scene in the film where a board of directors member speaks on how valuable a service the company is giving, and then says at the end, "And of course, make a lot of money!")
Later [...] Tuzman puts his hands together in prayer, and it's evident that he is not praying for peace in the world but for the survival of his business income [...] (GovWorks had never made a profit; it only generated the illusion that it would eventually make a profit. This is typical of all the startups that self-destructed at the start of the new millennium.)
Their obsession to become billionaires had defined their identity as human beings. And when they saw that dream of who they were to become vanish, the fallout from their disillusionment began. It took the form of a bitter breakup between two young men who were practically blood brothers since their high school days. To preserve his CEO status, Tuzman fired Herman, and Herman left in bitter, stunned disbelief. Tuzman's girlfriend broke up with him, for he devoting all his time to business, and she felt irrelevant.
The end of this documentary film leaves the two entrepreneurs as shells of human beings. They had invested their entire sense of themselves as men who had the potential of being admired for their wealth and power, but all they were left with was congealed snow in their hands.
cont'd from note 4462
this movie sounds amazing
[...] they were feeling depressed; while the stock market soared, their souls were plummeting. They were unhappy, but the media was telling them that the size of their bank accounts and the prestigious jobs they held qualified them to be exceptionally happy. They were feeling guilty because they "should" be happy by the standard our society dictates for happiness. And because they weren't, they felt guilty, since they played by society's rules and yet did not receive the emotional benefits they thought they were entitled to. They had conformed to society's criteria of happiness (that is, wealth and a good job as the tickets of entrance to an exciting life filled with love, emotional satisfaction, and a future of ever-expanding possibilities for triumphing over new challenges life would present in the subsequent years).
The men and women we saw who expressed to us their depressive feelings in the face of material success thought they were exceptions to the rule and felt something was wrong with them for feeling the way they did. [...]
They were looking for answers in all the wrong places. For they weren't abnormal people [...] unhappiness was - and is - a national problem, not a sign of individual failure. [...]
on the people who sought them out for counseling. damn
The companies they worked for created wombs in which all their creature-comfort needs could be satisfied. It seemed great at the time they started their employment, but three or four years later [...] began to understand that a career was just a career, and a company was only a company, not a lifetime culture. For it is the very nature of a company to be solely concerned about its own profits and stock-market price. A company's loyalty is to its own bottom line, not the welfare of its workers. If the welfare of its workforce enhances the bottom line, fine. If not, increased productivity demands and downsizing will substitute for workforce creature comforts. [...]
not the most elegant phrasing but an important thing to remember
The twenty-somethings, not having developed a long-term sense of self that enabled the older men and women to prevail over expected economic tribulations, were vulnerable to psychological onslaughts on their sense of self [...] They had graduated in complicated technological arenas and felt smug about that fact [...] they had a skillful relationship with things; they delighted in solving technical programs, repairing, building, and creating new tools [...] The challenges were endless, and the delight in overcoming those challenges was enormous. It could be the best drug in the world and more satisfying then eating a decent meal or sleeping as salve to the soul. A king-of-the-world feeling.